Jackass: 3D (2010)

Now this requires no introduction, explanation or any form of justification. Its a bunch of guys hurting themselves, engage in toilet humour and laughing till it hurts. Turned sideways, rolled up, tightened and shoved up the patootie of common deceny and sense. And hey, its all good!

The Skinny: buncha guys finds hilarity through pain and defecation. 

The Helmer: Jeff Tremaine - 30 For 30 (2010 TV), Nitro Circus (2009 TV), Jackass 2.5 (2007), Jackass Number Two (2006), Wild Boyz (2003 TV), Jackass: Gumball Rally Special (2005 TV), Jackass: Volume 2 (2004 V), Jackass: The Movie (2002), Boob (1999).

The Casts: (All as Themselves) Johnny Knoxville, Bam Margera, Steve-O, Chris Pontius, Jason Acuna, Ryan Dunn, Preston Lacy, Dave Enland, Ehren McGhehey, John Taylor.

Release Date: 15th October 2010

The Prediction: more pain, more laughs, more poo, more pee but IN 3D!! Nuff said! Woohoo!

Trailer
Official Movie Site
Wikipedia on Jackass 

Machete (2010)

Do you like exploitation movies? Do you relish 70s rough-cut, single-linear plotted, badly acted movies with abundance of gore and flesh? If yes, that technically you'd like Robert Rodriguez's Machete. Its taken directly from the Grindhouse trailer which was featured in the Death Proof / Planet Terror openings.So what can you expect? From the tagline, pretty much of alot of everything - decent man to savage who must slaughter to stay alive? Pretty much sums it up.

 

The Skinny: Bad-ass Mexican Danny Trejo is ex-Federale Machete on revenge mode when he is betrayed by his bosses and the organization. 

The Helmer: Robert Rodrigez and Ethan Maniquis - RR: Shorts (2009), Planet Terror (2007), The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lava Girl (2005), Sin City (2005), Once Upon a Time in Mexico, Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over (2003), Spy Kids 2: Island of Lost Dreams (2002), Spy Kids (2001), The Faculty (1998), From Dusk Till Dawn (1996), Desperado (1995),Roadracers (1994), El Mariachi (1992), Bedhead (1991).

The Casts: Danny Trejo (Machete), Robert Deniro (Senator McLaughlin), Michelle Rodriguez (Luz), Lindsay Lohan (April Benz), Jessica Alba (Sartana), Tim Roth (Agent Ringo Orange), Steven Seagal (Torrez), Don Johnson (Lt Stillman), Rose McGowan (Cherry Darling), Sacha Baron Cohen (Col Weathers), Jeff Fahey (Michael Benz), Tome Savini (Deputy Tollo), Cheech Marin (Padre Benito Del Toro).

Release Date: 3rd September 2010

The Prediction: How can this go wrong? You've got revolutionary director Rodriguez, you've got stellar casts led by Deniro, you've got hot chicks and naughty chicks Lohan, Alba and McGowan, you've got ass-kicker Seagal, you've got back-from-the-dead Johnson, you've got I-owe-you-my-life-and-career-mr-rodriguez Fahey, and you've got two funny men Marin and Cohen. Mix it up and you've got staple Rodriguez diet of bad-ass cast running about on a simple-crazy plot with supremo action and gore. This is it folks, the movie for 2010. 

Wikipedia on Machete 

Official Site 

Official Trailer

Takers (2010)

I kinda like the premise of this movie. However, I don't kinda like Paul Walker. I still can't take him seriously. He's like Keanu Reeves Lite. But it could just be me. Maybe I'm prejudiced against skinny dudes with pretensions of toughness. Who knows? 

The Skinny: Bank robbers versus a relentless detective hot on their trail. Kick-ass action ensues. 

The Helmer: John Leussenhop - Lockdown (2000).

The Casts: Paul Walker, Idris Elba, Matt Dillon, Zoe Saldana, Hayden Christensen, Jay Hernandez.

Release Date: 27th August 2010

The Prediction: This looks to be a great movie, but it seems to have however, in my books, two weak links: Paul Walker and evil Jedi Hayden Christensen. I still view them as teen-agers mixing about with grown men. Even though I enjoyed the crap out of Jumper (2008), because it has been a fantasy of mine to just 'jump' anywhere on the planet, and I did think that true account of lying journalist Stephen Glass in Shattered Glass (2003) was highly entertaining, I can't take him seriously. Again, he is the Paul Walker of the alternate universe where its okay to pretend to play tough men. Having said that, the premise of this movie is pretty sound, and it does have the excellent London bloke Idris Elba (which is yet to get a true, teeth-sinking meaty role apart from that of Stringer Bell in the sprawling cops and politics HBO original The Wire) and theres Matt Dillon in it (always good which way you look at it), and the current, very edible It Girl Zoe Saldana, who can't seem to do anything wrong. On the whole, the pros outweighs the cons. The trailer strongly suggests a very fast paced, all-action film with a seemingly solid script. 

Official Site

Youtube.com Trailer

Sucker Punch (2011)

There are 2D movies, 3D movies, cartoons, 3D cartoons and theres Zack Snyder's. If you've seen 300, and Watchmen you know what I'm talking about. His movies can best be described as not so much watching a movie, but actually experiencing it, as he mixes CGI and extreme detail on an elaborate platform sensationally. So if you know theres a Zack Snyder movie coming up, you know you're in for a cinematic treat. Cue Sucker Punch. 

The Skinny: Read imdb.com's succint synopsis: 

"A young girl is institutionalized by her wicked stepfather. Retreating to an alternative reality as a coping strategy, she envisions a plan which will help her escape from the facility."

The Helmer: Zack Snyder - Legend of the Guardians: the Owls of Ga' Hoole (2010), Watchmen (2009), 300 (2006), Dawn of the Dead (2004), Morrissey: iOye Esteban! (2000 V), Playground (1990).

The Casts: Jon Hamm(High Roller), Emily Browning (Baby Doll), Vanessa Hudgens (Blondie), Jamie Chung (Amber), Jena Malone (Rocket)

Release Date: 25th March 2011


The Prediction: This a sci-fi fantasy movie with amazing CGI effects akin to a female version of the bloodfest 300. Expect lots of stylized slo-mo mouth a-gaping action with huge weapons pumping fist-sized bullets. Only hot chicks will be doing all the action. Which includes the jailbait known as Vanessa Hudgens from High School Musical , possibly kicking ass. I'm honestly wondering if this action fantasy will fly, but it is a Zack Snyder movie which turned a pretty penny with 300 when it chalked up USD210mill for US audience alone. But the buzz is pretty good on this one. 

Slashfilm.com's write-up and Trailer link

Wikipedia's write-up

MovieWeb.com's write up with photos

Faster (2010)

If only Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson reduced comic roles and focused more on action stints, then he'd really be the next king of action after Arnie. I liked him only in 2 movies The Rundown, as Beck the bail-jumper bounty hunter, and Walking Tall, as Chris Vaughn an ex-military guy who takes on a whole town. Why? Because the characters he played were well constructed and well focused on kicking ass. So enough with The Game Plan, Tooth Fairy and other comic-contradiction-type films, its time to bring the smack down baby!

The Skinny: Johnson is ex-con out from prison hunting down the man who killed his brother. 

The Helmer: George Tillman Jr - Notorious (2009), Men of Honor (2000), Soul Food (1997), Scenes for the Soul (1995), Paula (1992).

The Casts: Dwayne Johnson (Driver), Billy Bob Thornton (Cop), Micaela Johnson (Cocktail Waitress)

Release Date: 24th November 2010

The Prediction: We have a helmer with slightly significant directing chops, we have the Gayton Brothers on writing duty, and we have the Rock. This is a revenge-mode movie and I've never said no to revenge-fueled action, because revenge is a primal source of human aggression: its justified violence, and that really is good violence to watch. And looking at the trailer, this is a pretty decent ass-kicking revenge-based action flick. It helps that the co-star of this movie is a Mustang.

Wikipedia

Official Site

Trailer 

30 Days of Night: Dark Days (2010) Direct to Video

Vampire movies generally suck, especially emotional vampire movies where the leading vampire dude is pale, moans over lost love and gets entangled in a three-way with a human and a werewolf. Its like watching a vampire version of sex and the city, or desperate housewives. The only vampires i personally like are ones with Christopher Lee in it, The Lost Boys, and John Carpenter's Vampires. These vampire movies had A: Vicious, animal-frenzy vampires and B:Kick-ass vampire killers. Which is how it should be. So when a new vampire movie comes up that defies the current trend of sissy vampires, you take notice and appreciate. Cue 30 Days of Night and the direct to video sequel 30 Days of Night: Dark Days.  

The Skinny: This is continuation from the first installment, where the surviving wife of the sheriff who died whilst defending his small Alaskan town from decimation from a group of vicious vampires, grabs the opportunity to exact revenge on the head vampire which led to the death of her husband. The synopsis from imdb.com reads: 

"It has been a year since the isolated Alaskan town of Barrow's population was decimated by vampires during its annual month long sunset. Riddled with grief over the death of her husband Eben, bound by nightmares and void of all emotions beyond hate and sorrow, Stella Oleson has spent the past months traveling the world, trying to convince others that vampires exist. Met with skepticism and laughter, she is ready to throw in the towel when a group of lost souls offers an incredible opportunity: the chance to exact revenge upon Lilith, the vampire queen responsible for the assault on her sleepy Alaskan town. With nothing remaining to live for, and nothing left to fear, Stella joins their mission and ventures into the uncharted underbelly of Los Angeles where she pushes herself to the most extreme limits to stop the evil from striking again. Written by Fango".

The Helmer: Ben Ketai - 30 Days of Night: Dust to Dust (2008 TV), Megan (2008), Suck (2008)

The Casts: Kiele Sanches (Stella), Mia Kirshner (Lilith), Rhys Coiro (Paul), Ben Cotton (Dane) Stacy Roy (Jane), Troy Ruptash (Agent Norris)

Release Date: 5th October 2010

The Prediction: As a general rule, direct to video movies tend to be low-budgeted, sub-standard produced efforts which, to the best of intentions, gets to the business of just indulging in the whims of audience who are curious about what happened next which in effect dilute over time and sequels. But, there are exceptions, such as Wrong Turn: Dead End ,a sequel to the hugely popular Wrong Turn. It essentially depends on the writer and director and the money splurged on this. Ben Ketai seems to have a career in helming horror movies, and though the original 30 Days was not hugely successful, it was done with great care and craft. Looking at the trailer, production costs and value seems to be high and the pacing pretty exciting. Which added up, looks very promising. 

Trailer

Official Site

Monsters (2010)

I love monster movies; I like the feeling of overpowering dread of horribly ugly large living things slopping its way around causing mayhem and destruction, drawing you close into its gaping horror. It gives me a kick all the time. Which is why this movie looks very very promising. Moreso as it is helmed by a Brit. And everyone knows Brit directors rock. :)

The Skinny: NASA's exploratory expedition into space to seek out intelligent life succeeds as it crash lands in Mexico with an extra payload which in this is of course, monsters.Slashfilm.com has a great synopsis on this:

Six years ago NASA discovered the possibility of alien life within our solar system. A probe was launched to collect samples, but crashed upon re-entry over Central America. Soon after, new life forms began to appear and grow. In an effort to stem the destruction that resulted, half of Mexico was quarantined as an INFECTED ZONE. Today, the American and Mexican military still struggle to contain the massive creatures… Our story begins when a jaded US journalist (McNairy) begrudgingly agrees to find his bosses daughter, a shaken American tourist (Able) and escort her through the infected zone to the safety of the US border.

Read more: Movie Trailer: Gareth Edwards’ Monsters | /Film http://www.slashfilm.com/2010/07/24/movie-trailer-gareth-edwards-monsters/#ixzz0uxqZL7fq

The Helmer: Gareth Edwards- Heroes and Villains (2008 TV), Perfect Disaster (2006 TV), End Day (2005)

The Casts: Scoot McNairy and Whitney Able

The Prediction: Low budget movies are great platforms to promote new, indie players into the market and to provide audience with a seemingly first person horrific moments (think Blair Witch Project) up front. Given that CGIs are more accessible than ever before, and that smart usage of it (i.e. using it sparringly) will make it appear more real, all that is needed is a great story line and effective build up. io9.com has a great write up on this as well, together with some trailers.